tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2030192151060424815.post3117365092452858300..comments2023-09-03T02:35:10.651-07:00Comments on Matt's Corner: the dreaded wordBeastinblackhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16001553829217827228noreply@blogger.comBlogger5125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2030192151060424815.post-87461106041898637832009-02-18T19:00:00.000-08:002009-02-18T19:00:00.000-08:00if AS is genetic who would want their child to hav...<I>if AS is genetic who would want their child to have such a condition?</I><BR/><BR/>I do not want children at all, but if I did, I think I'd do better with a child who was also autistic. I would not understand an NT child, nor would I be able to give them the kinds of things they would need from a parent.Lindsayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10860246538349067232noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2030192151060424815.post-73783564247768243012009-01-31T21:59:00.000-08:002009-01-31T21:59:00.000-08:00Hi, I think you're looking too much into what a re...Hi, I think you're looking too much into what a relationship would "expect" out of you. With my husband with Asperger's we fit each other because I was a very private person and one of those people that couldn't have friends that wanted to do stuff all the time or discuss everything. I needed my own time and space, and with my husband, with Asperger's, he had his own things he was focused on and his own routines, and so somehow we fit because neither of us demanded so much of the other. <BR/><BR/>You don't have to give your spouse all your undivided attention all the time, and it's OK if I don't want to talk or my husband doesn't want to talk, or he wants to do something that I don't or vice versa. It's more of a "comfortable" thing with us. I could fit inside his parameters of routine and he could fit inside my walls of insecurity and privacy. We do love each other, and it's OK if words aren't always shared, it goes by actions or time, or just being there, even if there means you aren't really doing anything.<BR/><BR/>Don't give up on the finding a mate thing. It just takes somebody different, and usually who you least expect. I never in a million years would have picked out my hubbie, but it happened and it wasn't by some pick up line or anything, I actually thought he was the biggest dork at first, but over time I realized I could talk to him a little or a lot and he could do the same and we weren't demanded upon each other and so we felt things could go well. <BR/><BR/>Don't think too hard, and don't stress that you're out of the norm. I enjoy reading your point of view. <BR/><BR/>Oh, and the comment above about if AS is genetic who would want a child to have such a condition" ---Hey I believe a part of it is genetic, but I have no problem with my son inheriting it from my husband. Asperger's may have it's problems and differences, but with it comes such uniqueness, and incredible traits and abilities that a NT wouldn't have, and I wouldn't trade those for the world.Beccahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05737471455195883868noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2030192151060424815.post-56174661729682422722008-12-28T17:21:00.000-08:002008-12-28T17:21:00.000-08:00Matt, if I can be presumptuous here, I am guessing...Matt, if I can be presumptuous here, I am guessing that many, many relationships, and their occupants, are not necessarily happy.<BR/>There seems to be so many expectations, supposed relationship formulas and so on, that many 'couples' aspire to; aim for; believe they must achieve in order to be happy (ever after).<BR/>The best relationships I've witnessed are ones where the respective partners really understand and accept each other for who they are; give each other 'space'; are realistic about life and what a true relationship entails; doesn't place 'pressure' on the other; values each other's uniqueness, value and place in the world, and so on.<BR/>But I feel that these types of 'balanced' relationships are few and far between.<BR/>Many 'equations' in the 'NT' world don't always produce a desired answer.<BR/>Some people may be blessed with finding the 'right' one soon in life. For others it may take a life-time, and for others again they may never find the 'best fit'.<BR/>What I do tend to believe is that there is someone somewhere for all of us. It's not what is 'written' in the proforma-book of 'relationship equations', but is held in the natural 'laws' of nature.<BR/>Hope that all made sense :)Louise Pagehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01877371980944574464noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2030192151060424815.post-22447174855216328502008-12-18T18:10:00.000-08:002008-12-18T18:10:00.000-08:00"if AS is genetic who would want their child to ha..."if AS is genetic who would want their child to have such a condition"<BR/><BR/>- someone I know is always telling me (because I'm so "clever") that I should want kids and it would be a shame if I never passed my genes on. If only they knew.AS-4-Lhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01812068998304682312noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2030192151060424815.post-28953142722874631702008-12-18T18:00:00.000-08:002008-12-18T18:00:00.000-08:00This comment has been removed by the author.AS-4-Lhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01812068998304682312noreply@blogger.com